Monday 11 April 2011

Passed her the things I promised her on 9th April which was Soy'C, saw her for the last time.. after that time, she was a stranger...a stranger I've never met before.. I don't know her, I must not know anymore.... I got no reason to contact her anymore...I can't say I like her anymore...It's like I lost everything I ever wanted to protect, everything that proved my existence is just gone like the wind... I feel so empty now.. my heart feels nothing anymore... I don't even feel alive anymore..It is the end of my world.. My whole world is crashing down on me.. I don't believe anymore...I won't hope for anything anymore... things like these are for people who still have dreams.. who still have a goal...I'm just a fragment of memory that was not supposed to exist at all.. in that case, let me just disappear... No one needs me anyway...No one requires my help anyway.. I can't find a reason to continue living in this forsaken world at all... everything I do is just pointless...it's just an eyesore..I am nothing...

allbroken; 16:04

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Tuesday 5 April 2011

Haiz...nothing to do...lazy to do and too moody to do are 3 different things..nothing to do is that you have finished doing all the things you needed to finish..but in life, that's practically impossible..Lazy to do, well it's self-explanatory.. means you're just too lazy or can't be bothered to get it done.. too moody to do, well like what I'm feeling now anyways... is that I want to do it.. but i just can't seem to get the will or heart to do it... haiz.. so depressing ... phone is still dead.. not as in spoilt.. but just that no one contacts me.. yea...I'm only remembered when I'm needed.. that's still the truth.. if people don't need anything, they won't remember me..it's like i am non-existent to this realm... to this planet...then what am i to do in this world then?? What is the destiny that awaits me in this world that i can actually accomplish? can someone or something show or tell me? no one knows how it feels to be like this at all, everyone is just enjoying their time... I'm an outcast to everyone..maybe I should really just leave everything behind and move away...no one needs me anyway... pfft.. this is so depressing... all i can do.. is just to act happy and non-concerned.. when inside of me is just tearing apart....will someone ever save me?

allbroken; 22:22

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Sunday 3 April 2011

Today and yesterday was about the same.. nothing special happened...nothing much to do....phone also very quiet..nobody contacts me anymore..now i really wonder what my phone is used for..maybe just using some of it's applications or checking time..I'm just sitting here...waiting for someone to notice me...if they ever will..usually they'll only remember me when they need something...haiz... I'm just waiting to disappear from the face of this earth... useless and pointless me.. what's the use of waiting in this world when no one needs or remembers me? ...

btw... Rest In Peace saya (沙谷,15/03/2011), one of japan's best cosplayers.. may your legacy last for eternity..

allbroken; 21:35

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Friday 1 April 2011

So today is well was April's fools anyway, heard some people enjoyed their day getting pranked by each other.. some not, well life sucks for them then...none of my business..too bad for them..
My day was really normal.. stayed at home, watch the sky, waiting for something interesting to happen in my life, which unfortunately, did not occur at all, no one ever contacts me to chat anyway...sometimes i wonder what's my phone for since no one contacts me much anyway... I got a email, it gets more mails daily than i get smses or calls...haiz...bet tomorrow is gonna be the same thing over again... wee... how interesting.. [adds sarcasm x 1000] 

On a side note, this being my first post for this blog, thanks to yii-chan for helping me code and make it..and for ranting me to do a first post..

allbroken; 22:22

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